*sparkle sparkle* It’s so beautiful!
I have this crazy routine whenever I get a rejection letter. I’ll script it for ya:
Me (seeing the notification in my inbox): I know it’s another rejection! I won’t get upset this time, it’s normal.
Daughter Lia: You don’t know that.
Me: Yes it is! It’s a rejection, it always is! But it’s okay.
Lia: Oh my gosh.
Me (clicking on it, reading it): See, I told you! *reads the rejection letter, mocks the lack of punctuation and overused cliches such as “alas” and “do not despair, another agent may be interested in your work”* I suck! What am I doing wrong?
Lia: You don’t suck.
Me (starting to despair): Yes I do! I’m a crappy writer and I’ll never get published! I need my rejection candy! WAAAAAAH
Lia: Shut up, you don’t suck.
Me: YES I DO!! They won’t even look at it because I don’t have a degree! *shoves away laptop and buries head in pillow*
Dennis: I’ll go get your rejection candy.
Me (perking up): Okay!
So last night I got two notifications at once. I immediately warmed up and started yelling “I suck” before I even clicked on the first one. Lia was getting ready to throw something at me, and then I bet her a rejection candy that the second one would also be a rejection. I was in mid-bawl by the time I clicked on the second email. Well, shock of all shocks, this lovely agent actually requested sample chapters and a synopsis! After 31 rejections. Yay! I’m happy to pay Lia her rejection candy. And I get a celebration candy!
I realize she still may decline to represent me, and I’ll probably have a long road of many more rejections ahead–but at this point I’ll cling to any positive news like someone hanging off the edge of a cliff. It was very, very nice to hear the word “maybe” instead of a “no.”
I still think I suck!